Having a family member or close friend that’s suffering from a substance use disorder (SUD) is a challenging and heartrending reality. And being faced with a loved one that refuses to get the help they so devsperately need can leave you feeling all the more frustrated and pained. What to do?
Firstly, know that you’re not alone. In 2020, out of the 40 million adults in the US who struggled with a substance use disorder, only 4 million received treatment! Secondly, try not to judge or blame your loved one. Drugs affect the way the brain works, and they might be acting in ways that are out of character and reason. Realize that these attitudes and difficult behaviors stem from their drunken/high state, and the resulting inability to control their behavior. In this blog, we will share some helpful tips on how to convince someone to go to rehab.
How Do You Convince Someone to go to Rehab?
Convincing a loved one to attend rehab is a daunting task, but with the right tools and approach it is possible. Avenues Recovery outlines some steps in how to discuss rehab with your loved one and successfully persuade them to attend.
How To Convince Someone To Go To Rehab: Step One
Educate Yourself
Ensure you’re familiar with the topic and signs of abuse and addiction, specifically your loved one’s addiction. When researching, try to delve into these topics:
- Causes and mechanisms of addiction: Learn about addiction and how it happens. The NIDA’s website would be a great place to start. Armed with knowledge, you’ll be able to explain to your loved one why treatment is so necessary.
- The drug in question: Your loved one’s reactions will likely depend on the type of drug they are using. They may respond with anger, aggression, paranoia or anxiety. Be aware of the specific drugs they are using, and their common side effects.
- Co-occurring mental health disorders: Your loved one might be using drugs to treat mental health disorders such as schizophrenia or depression. If this is the case, learn about the treatment that is needed to help both conditions concurrently.
- Treatment and therapy options: Research about the different courses of treatment and therapy available out there to help you decide what type will best suit your loved one’s needs. These include inpatient rehab for more serious addiction issues, and outpatient rehab, where one can live at home and attend treatment sessions regularly. Moreover, knowing about the different types of therapies can further widen your knowledge and enable you to provide guidance with confidence.
How To Convince Someone To Go To Rehab: Step Two
Have An Open Discussion With Your Loved One
With empathy, sincerity and warmth, discuss with your loved one your concerns about his substance misuse and the negative impact it has on him and his surrounding friends and family. Try to have this conversation when you sense the time is ripe, such as when he’s sobered and calm and you’re both not in a rush. Don’t be judgmental or critical. Try to use ‘I statements’ to state how you feel about the situation. This will prevent the person from becoming defensive. For example, you could say:
- “I feel afraid and unsafe after you drink a lot of alcohol.”
- “I miss the time we spent together when you were calmer and happier”
It’s understandable that you might be experiencing feelings like sadness, anger, frustration, shame or guilt, to name a few. Try to hold back the negative emotions bubbling within you and threatening to spill over, as that would be counterproductive. Instead, do your best to stay calm and express why you feel it’s important that your loved one goes for help. Be honest and kind.
You could then offer to introduce them to a counselor or therapist, or someone you think can lead them to the best place of treatment. If you are met with resistance, don’t despair. You can always try again!
How To Convince Someone To Go To Rehab: Step Three
Plan An Intervention
An intervention can be an effective approach to dealing with an addict. What is an intervention? It’s a meeting of loved ones and friends of the addict, and sometimes an intervention specialist, where the addiction is discussed and an ultimatum is issued: either agree to enter treatment, or face certain consequences. For example, a partner might tell them that they will no longer be allowed into the house, or a boss might inform them that they will lose their job if they do not agree to the conditions offered to them. The participants of the intervention will also explain that if the addict agrees to go for help, they will help and support them in any way possible. I.e. they will arrange the finances, look after the addict’s children/pets, or retain their job for them while they are away.
Although it might sound harsh, an intervention is really the truest form of love, since it stems from genuine care and concern for the wellbeing of the person suffering.
How To Convince Someone To Go To Rehab: Step Four
Don’t Wait For The Situation To Worsen
The longer one delays getting help for addiction, the more dangerous the situation gets. Waiting until your loved one reaches ‘rock bottom’ could potentially be life-threatening, as overdose could occur. Moreover, the longer one uses drugs, the greater the risk for long-term effects.
How To Convince Someone To Go To Rehab: Step Five
Implement a Treatment Plan
As soon as your loved one agrees that treatment is necessary, enroll him in the rehab that has been booked before the intervention. One of the NIDA’s Principles of Effective Treatment is to begin the treatment process the minute the person gives consent to the treatment plan.
What Not to Say When Convincing Someone to go to Rehab
Stuck with how to convince an alcoholic to get help? The following are some careless comments and threats one should avoid when trying to convince someone to get the help they need:
- Instead of saying: “I know what you’re going through,”
Say: “I’m sorry that you’re going through this.”
- Instead of saying: “You’ll never change,”
Say, “making mistakes doesn’t make you a failure.”
- Instead of saying: “Why can’t you just quit drinking/using________?”
Say: “I want to help you recover. What do you say to this amazing rehab…?”
- Instead of saying: “Unless you quit, I’m leaving you!”
Say: “I want to help you become sober and healthy.”
- Instead of saying: “Go get help,”
Say: “Can I help you find the help you deserve?”
- Instead of saying: “I’m ashamed of you,”
Say: “I’m here to help you through the recovery process.”
- Instead of saying: “You’re selfish,”
Say: “I love you, but when you drink you act differently and I don’t like you.”
Can You Force Someone to go to Rehab?
There are certain circumstances where one can force another person to go to rehab. If you have tried and failed to convince your loved one to attend a treatment program, forcing him might be the final resort.
- If you are the parents or legal guardian, you may enroll your child in a rehab against his will.
- If the person is a threat to himself or those around him, he can be sent to rehab without his consent.
- Court-ordered rehab and involuntary commitment may allow you to send the person to rehab against his wishes.
The fact that only those that want help can achieve sobriety is a myth. Most addicts will refuse or deny help at first, but once they’re in a quality treatment program, they can make great progress and change their lives for the better.
Is it Ever Too Late to Help Someone with Substance Use Disorder?
Research has shown that it’s never too late for someone with a substance use disorder to be helped. No matter how old the person is, one could still quit using substances and embrace a healthier life. One should never despair and give up hope on himself or a loved one, as luckily, help is always around the corner. With just one call, the treatment process can be planned and initiated.
At Avenues Recovery we believe that everyone deserves treatment, no matter their history or background. Our expert staff have helped over 40,000 individuals break free of their addictions and live sober lives, and they can help you too. Contact Avenues Recovery today to find out how we can help you turn your life around for the better and achieve inner happiness and fulfillment.
Do it for yourself, for your loved ones and for your future.